Jokes

Whoa, guys! I'm actually writing for the second day in a row! I figured, I'm in England right now, so why not write about things? Besides, if this is something I want to do in the future, I should probably practice. Probably.

I am normally a person who makes TERRIBLE jokes or has terrible delivery or timing, but will still laugh at my joke while others roll their eyes or groan or even fake laugh (but it's okay when they're my friends. Or is it? DUN DUN DUN!), but lately, I think I made some good jokes! For instance, last night, a friend from uni and I were watching the stand up comedian Michael McIntyre (or check out this video and try not to laugh) and he made a joke about someone mistaking a BLT to mean bread, lettuce and tomato. In that case, a G&T would be a glass and tonic, right? So we were laughing, and earlier I had asked her if people called others gits, to which she replied that you wouldn't call people of your generation a git, but you might call an older person a git (if you were trying to be rude). "Grumpy old git" is a phrase they might use to describe an old curmudgeonly person like that. So if a G&T is a glass and tonic, a GIT might be a glass, ice and tonic. Could you imagine walking up to a bartender and saying "I'll have a GIT, but it better be old and grumpy!" Okay, maybe it was funnier back then.

Then today my friend was separating the water from her spaghetti, and I asked if she called the device a colander or a strainer. She said she usually called it a strainer, but sometimes referred to it with the former term. I replied, "Strainer things have happened."
"I guess the truth's strainer than fiction."
"Have you seen what I consider the two best movies? Pirates of the Caribbean  On Strainer Tides, and Strainers on a Train."


Haha PUNS.